Regrets

Did I play it too safe? I've been asking myself this question for a bit now. It used to be that I thought I was too loose, too rebellious when I was young, and that it hampered me later. If I could just go back, really concentrate at school, ask out the girls I wanted without hesitation, whether it worked or not, not drink as much but write twice as much. I thought I wasn't serious enough. Then I watch Star Trek tonight.















The episode is "Tapestry" of ST:TNG. It begins with Picard being brought onto a medical table, Crusher desperate to save his life. He dies and is met in the afterlife by Q. He is given the chance to go back and relive his youth. So he plays it safe. Doesn't get stabbed by the Nausicans. Sleeps with his best friend. Saves his buddy from making a fool of himself. All is good.







And Q brings him to the present where he is no longer Captain of the USS Enterprise, but instead a Lt. Astrophysics officer who spends his days filing reports and charting stars. He never took a risk and now he's bereft of passion and imagination. All he wants now is to die on that table the man he wants to be than live out his years a man he could have been.

I wonder if all I do is chart stars, rather than braving them.